What I Learned in My 61st Year

One reason I love my teacher David Hartman is because he always challenges his students to grow. To be more than they think they can be. To do those things that are the scariest, the most daunting. To have adventures and joy. To be scared and be sad. 

So in 2008 when David told my Wellness Mentors Group that he and the Wellness teachers were scheduling another Vision Quest in Sedona, Arizona in the fall of 2009 I knew I had to sign up. 

I don't know why, but somewhere deep inside me there was a huge curiosity and a huge fear about doing a Vision Quest. Five days and four nights out in the open with a tarp, sleeping bag and warm clothes. That was it. No water. No food. No books. No electronic devices. Just me. I was terrified. And I still committed to the Quest.

I read and prayed and prepared for about nine months preceding the Quest. Our Questers met with David at different times to talk about our fears, to ask questions and to ponder the enormity of what we had committed to. Despite my fears I pressed on. I made my prayer ties, read, wrote and mostly sat in fear of the actual Quest. No water. Hmmmmm. No food. A bigger hmmmmm. 

I made it to the Quest and I actually did pretty well. Meaning, at the end I was strong and steady on my feet. I was ready to rejoice and to have some WATER. And FOOD. I left my site when the leaders came to get me and went into the sweat lodge for the final sweat and then....WATER! Food! 

What I learned in my 61st year was to keep pushing myself. To try those things I never thought I could do. I am strong, from good immigrant farming stock, and when I make a decision to learn about myself deeply, I can commit. I can complete. 

Did I have a vision? I am not sure. I know that the mantra that kept going through my mind was: things are going to change. What? Nothing came clear. Just that things are going to change. And they did in a very big way and I believe that my steadfastness, my inner knowing that all my needs would be met - just like on the Vision Quest - kept me going through a very difficult few years. 

I encourage clients also to keep growing, to keep learning - to live! If you are breathing just a little and calling it a life, call/text me 360-432-1236.