Being 'sheltered' has brought up memories, for me, of other times I have been alone. Alone either by choice or necessity.
One memory in particular has been very vivid lately. In 2009 I did my first Vision Quest outside Sedona, Az. Perched on the side of a small mountain I had my small, sacred space contained by blessed strings of bundled tobacco. I had a sleeping bag. The clothes I was wearing. A tarp. Nothing else. No food. No water. Just Father Sky, Mother Earth and me.
My very first night I was a little nervous as I had never slept outside without at least a tent. As it grew dark - this was in late September - it got cold. And dark. Really dark. I felt like I dozed a bit but I was on high alert. And during the night, my worst fears were realized: I heard animal sounds and something snorting. As these sounds came closer I was panicked! I stood up and waved my sarong/towel/skirt/blanket in the air and said loudly: "I mean you no harm." I did this several times. Then I heard 'hoof' sounds running away.
In my imagination I had confronted a huge 'evil pig' with giant tusks and red, glowing eyes! It was only after I returned to camp. 5 days and 4 nights later, that I was told these were havelinas, small wild pigs indigenous to the Southwest.
I did not sleep. I watched the sky the rest of the night, trying to get comfortable in my sacred space, realizing that the direction of my space was on a decline. So trying NOT to roll downhill was not easy.
The night passed and as I could see clearly to the east the sun showing over the horizon, I realized, as I cried and sobbed, that I was so GRATEFUL for the morning light. That somehow I had feared not living to the next morning.
Each day of that experience was magical as the sun came up. And to top off the experience, all the supporters in the camp far below drummed and sang and hollered as the sun peeked over the rim of the next mountain, letting me know I was not alone. That there was love and support...and the courage to complete the Quest.
So now, for me, each morning has significance. Meaning. And I draw strength from the sun coming up to another day!
I am a catalyst for others, helping people continue, over their entire life span - preconception, conception, in the womb and after - to grow, learn, heal so that each person can live their deepest longings. This is my passion.
Adventurer, lover of beauty, seeking clarity, harmony & balance. Compassionate. Just. Fair. Grateful. Hugely grateful.
ONE more time: HUGELY GRATEFUL.