I was on a phone call this morning and one of the participants said to another: "talking about your fears can help reduce them, or they might even go away".
I thought to myself: wow, yes!
So here are my thoughts on how talking can help:
It can be cathartic: instead of holding all your emotions inside your head, feeling overwhelmed, in pain...and stuck, talking about what is going on can help. It helps us get more clear, we feel relief, and our feelings are less charged. (Choose someone who is focused and truly witnessing you with kindness and compassion.)
Talking can help you feel better: talking with another feels more like a 'shared experience' rather than an ONLY you experience. (Again, choose someone who is focused and truly witnessing you with kindness and compassion.)
Talking can lead to new solutions: how many times have you felt stuck but after talking to a friend, family member, partner...you realized there were more ways to solve an issue than you originally believed.
And lastly, but importantly, self-talk: many therapists, and self-help books, recommend that you can literally change the way you think by paying attention to your self-talk. If you 'hear' yourself being negative, bitter, angry...notice how these emotions influence your thinking and your actions.
A form of self-talk that is good is to have a statement you repeat to yourself like "I am ok, or I am safe" as a really healthy form of self-talk. Just like angry and bitter self-talk influences our thoughts and often our behavior, what would kind messages do for you?
If you would like to explore your self-talk and subsequent thoughts and behaviors, I can help! Call/text 360-432-1236. I would love to help.