I had a lovely telly consult with a potential client last night. This person is experiencing such pain and loss right now that it is hard for them to remember the good things, the good days...the good moments.
We talked about the issues that are happening and how the healing and change could occur.
At these moments I am very aware that the pain and sadness, the struggle is so very real for the one I am talking to. I do my best to listen well and with an open heart. I can feel the pain, and I don't take it on. And I can feel it.
As we spoke this person said to me: "I like who I am on my good days." I felt the resonance of that, the truth of that. And of course, the person spoke about the other days or moments when the liking turns to self-sabotage, self-recriminations and blame. When this person hurts others.
It is so hard to remember the 'good days' when we are in pain. And you know, it is often not until we are in pain and despair that we reach out for help. When the loss or situation becomes so hard to bear that we feel we are 'lost'. Not redeemable. Not worthy. Confused. Uncertain.
I do not know if this person will contact me again to work with me. I hope so. I would love to be able to remind this person gently and yet with persistence that they do 'like who they are' on their good days. That healing does happen, that reunion within and with their loved ones does happen. It takes work, admittedly. And yet, I am always there, whispering quietly: "Who are you on your good days? What do you like about yourself at those times? Can you find it in your heart to forgive yourself on those 'other' days? At those 'other' times?
And sometimes I am not whispering...I am asking the person to stand up, to ground, to EMBODY the 'self-liking, the self-compassion, the self-love. Sometimes to raise their arms in triumph!
Big task: yes. Possible: yes. Do-able: yes. Call me so I can whisper in your ear: "Like you, Love you. Value you." 360-432-1236